Why did you have kids if you don’t want them home with you?

Listen, it is time to stop asking people this question. Because it has ZERO to do with wanting the kids and EVERYTHING to do with needing structure. If a spontaneous day off here and there meets your needs and makes you happy, that is AWESOME. Unfortunately, the world is not you, and other people experience things differently.
snow days be like here's johnnyIt never fails. Any time there is a school break, planned or otherwise, you’ll see the line down the middle between the moms who OH EM GEE LOVE SNOW DAYS and the ones who are a bit grimmer and a bit quieter. And if one of the second kind mention after the 8th cancelled day in a row that they are ready for school to be back in session? Forget it. It’s like sharks just smelled blood. And not normal sharks. Crazed, half-starved movie sharks that have been hit with a cattle prod before the scene opened to make sure they are extra shark-y.

Take me, for example. I love my kids. In fact, I also LIKE my kids. A lot. I really enjoy their company. They are pretty cool dudes, each with a great sense of humor. Their table manners are not perfect, and I would appreciate greater devotion to the fine art of bathing, but they are smart, kind, funny, and pretty good looking if I do say so myself. So it isn’t that I don’t want them.

But there is a thing that happens when their schedule is interrupted, and that thing is a lot like feeding The Gremlins after midnight. And then taking them to the swimming pool.

These children get progressively more impulsive, emotional, and… creative (so help me) the longer they are out of school. And when that school break is unscheduled, and every other activity that might challenge them is also cancelled? This is bad. If the weather is too horrible to be outdoors for long, it’s intolerable.

You know how in The Shining being shut up together in a big old house for too long drives a man crazy and turns him into the latest incarnation of a serial killer?

I’m telling you that’s what snow days are like. So if you hear me (or anyone) dare to breathe a word that snow days are not completely magical?

Please get in front of us before anyone says “why did you even have kids if you don’t want them at home,” because I am telling you we will KILL THAT PERSON, and then our kids will never get back on schedule.

You can read more of my thoughts on The Hardest Job You’ll Ever Love right here, or if you would pretty please follow me on Twitter, that would be FANTASTIC.

About Meghan G

I like blues, punk, and crime drama. I love having boys, keeping active, and the outdoors. I'm a cat person, but I think dogs should have equal opportunities.

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